“Nobody’s perfect” is an important concept to keep in mind as social workers. I feel like “nobody’s perfect” should be a daily mantra that social workers say repeatedly for a lot of reasons. Foremost, this notion helps us to meet clients where they are at, wherever that may be, while we provide services. Sometimes clients are in the pre-contemplation phase of the empowerment process and that’s okay…nobody’s perfect. In fact, everybody is imperfect. We can challenge clients’ and maybe encourage their growth across the stages of change. However, this must be done without judgement and with the acknowledgement that mistakes are simply a part of growing pains.
Growing pains are actually an acute part of not just our physical, but also emotional existence as well. This is true for the social workers charged with service provisions. We simply don’t just jump into our profession knowing all the answers. Indeed, most practicing social workers will tell you, there is never one right answer to any social work issue. Rather, we must engage fully in every situation. We maximize and sometimes overburden our mental faculties, trying to allocate funds, advocating for clients, challenging individuals/communities/systems, and more with limited resources. How on earth is a child protective service caseworker supposed to not make a single mistake with a caseload of 45 families in severe need? It’s bound to happen. Even for those of us that are lucky to have small caseloads, mistakes happen because life is messy at times and because nobody is perfect. Social workers it’s okay to make mistakes, so long as the mistakes do little or no harm to our clients, which is what typically happens. Everybody is imperfect and mistakes help us grow. Truly nobody is perfect. I mean some people might seem perfect, but the truthfully nobody is. I was recently thinking to myself Anna Kendrick is perfect. She acts and sings. She is beautiful, funny, and nice. She has enough money to donate and buy pretty clothes at the same time. She even married Jake Gyllenhaal (okay so it was just in a film, but still I watched her marry him). And she has written and published her first novel. I have to admit that I was jealous of her when I found out that she has a book that is finished and published. Okay, I was also jealous when I was watching End of Watch too, but I’ve never been very good at staying jealous. I usually can’t stay jealous for no longer than five minutes. My excitement for life and how good things make the world better always wins over. Those great talents, extraordinary gifts, and the genius displayed by others are life-affirming and they make me happy. Furthermore nobody’s perfect, not even Anna Kendrick. Everybody’s bodily excretions smell bad, including hers, mine, and yours. The last time I checked, the only time my bathroom smells like roses, is when I decide to light a candle. I don’t know Anna Kendrick personally obviously, but I’m certain that woman has flaws. We all do. My gosh, I could fill a library with all of my flaws. I mean there’s just too many to even begin a list. For example, like the time I ranted about a racist soccer moms who think it’s okay to have a confederate flag on her white soccer mom minivan, during a phone interview. Who does that? Me, obviously because like you, Anna Kendrick, and everyone else in this world, I’m not perfect. Everybody is imperfect. Long story short nobody is perfect. And in all honesty it’s not just our gifts that glorify the world, it’s our imperfections too.
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This blog is dedicated to Jasmine and my current class of students
Recently, in a classroom discussion, my students and I spoke about wanting to add empathy as the seventh core value to the NASW Code of Ethics (2008). My students, have yet to declare social work as their profession, yet they immediately recognized empathy as an important aspect of the social work profession. They acknowledged that to be an effective social worker, one must attempt to imagine what it is like to live the life of another, or walk in their shoes so we say. We spoke about empathic attunement, or attempting to create an impermeable connectedness by tuning into clients’ emotions, experiences, and rhythm of being. I informed them that the NASW Code of Ethics has not been revised since 2008 and encouraged them to reach out to NASW, asking that empathy be included as a core value. Today, I very fortunately and accidentally called my former co-worker, Jasmine. I was sad to hear that she has experienced many losses since we worked together, but was inspired by how she allowed her own suffering to manifest as deep empathy. Although I could tell her losses had hurt her heart, I admired how she allowed grief to fuel her ability to connect with clients. Now, Jasmine, I must tell you was already one of the best social workers I know. However, as she described it to me, her dive into empathy established an awakening into the lived experiences of the people we serve. Empathy, she claimed made an already skilled social worker, even more effective. Jasmine and my students are right, empathy is profoundly important in how we approach social work. Not just on the micro and mezzo level but as we move forward in the current sociopolitical climate. As a profession, I think we must consider making empathy a core value, which in turn would emphasize the need of a whole profession to imagine what life is like for others. Not only will this improve how we intervene, but overall it will help us achieve our over-arching mission…to make society better. |
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