Tis the season that people not only talk about giving, but actually give with more frequency. There is something about the holidays and this time of the year. Maybe it is the illumination surrounding us that inspires a brightness within. Maybe the cold weather forces us to engage in more activities that warm the heart, soul, and spirit. Maybe, it is the simple expectation of gifting throughout the holidays that brings attentiveness to the power of giving. Truly, this atmosphere is powerful. People that refrained from charity throughout the year, feel compelled to and do engage in charitable giving. People stop at the chime of a Salvation Army bell, or the sight of a person that is homeless on the street, or a number of different things and share what they have to give.
People give in other ways this holiday season too. There’s a tendency to just reach out and connect more with others. Holiday cards are sent as a way to say “I am thinking of you and yours”. Gifts are bought thoughtfully, with the intent of pleasing the receiver. Parties are thrown to celebrate love, closeness, life, and the act of gifting. Food is prepared before and during the holidays so as to invite gathering. I know in my family, my mom and my Zia (aunt) in America, and also relatives now living in Piemonte, Italy, spend hours baking Grispelle or Turdilli, classic Christmas treats from Calabria. Italians will then sit around the treats, eat, speak with words/gestures, and sip on both the wonderful aroma and taste of espresso. This time of the year, I typically give my culture to my students too, by baking them either traditional Tiramisu if I can find lady fingers. Or in the case of this year making them Tiramisu Torte, an American version of the Italian classic. Even the of act cleaning, at least for me, adds to giving by beautifying the surroundings. Dishes are washed methodically, chairs and furniture are moved so no spot is missed when cleaning the floor, every corner is dusted, and tables are set in an intentionally luminous manner. We give to each other through cooking, baking, eating, talking, and other ways during these holiday gatherings. When you think about the holidays and the shift that occurs in how we treat one another, it is quite breath-taking. Originally I was going to write the stats about how many people world-wide live in poverty or how many people are diagnosed with mental illness or so many other things. I will save those stats for their corresponding blogs that will be written in the future. What I will say is this….there are so many ways to give and this giving can last year round. There is magic, a glimmer like fresh snow, when people connect through giving. This giving can be as a simple as telling a youth at-risk (typically who I serve as a therapist and researcher), “I believe in you” and “It’s not your fault, it’s the system”. One can give, by sitting and just listening to a person that is elderly, letting them know their story is worthwhile. A gift can be assuring someone that everyone, ever single last one of us, needs help at times. Telling someone that it is okay to identify as LGBTQ, accepting them that way, and maybe even reminding them that it was a common practice during Greek Civilization, which dictated the formulation of today's civilized society, can be a gift. Another way to give is by offering a hug or some space to somebody diagnosed with a mental illness, depending on what they need. Also letting people know it is okay to have a mental illness and informing them that Winston Churchill, the man who stopped the Nazis, had bipolar. Or reminding people diagnosed with autism that being different is courageous and then rolling with their differences. Welcoming people from other countries and asking them to share their culture is both a gift to the immigrant and the native. Or saying aloud, I think racism, discrimination, and sexism is wrong, I am sorry you experienced those realities; then not engaging in those forms of interactions. All these are gifts and really this list can go on forever. So what do I gift to all of you, first is this blog although I should be at a friend’s working on my dissertation. I also gift finishing my dissertation in 2016 to illicit awareness about the impact of poverty on minority youth living in Athens, and how this negatively affects their education through a failing public school system. I also gift a dedication to try to pry open my heart; this heart-opening in the past was only reserved for family, choice friends, mentors, the clients I am honored to serve, and the students I am honored to teach. I will remember to carry around dollar bills so that I can give to someone in need, instead of just giving them blessings because I don’t have cash or change. I also gift meeting hostility and oppression with grace, kindness, and education. I commit to striving to never lose my Italian temper again even when confronted by blatant social injustice. Dr. Martin Luther King was so wise in saying “Hate cannot drive out hate, only love can do that”. I commit to live by that saying. I will continue doing all that I can do with every inch of me to embody the social work values in everything I do: 1) service, 2) social justice, 3) dignity and worth of individuals, 4) importance of human relationships, 5) integrity, and 6) competence. I will continue to work hard as a social worker therapist, educator, researcher, and writer to emphasize strengths; while also challenging inequality and injustice. I will keep giving through praise, aide, compassion, empathy, and caring all year round. What will you do? In closing, I send all of you well wishes today, throughout the holidays, and the New Year.
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